Navigating through these survey responses sometimes makes me feel like a stranger in my own home. Out of place at times. I’m trying my best to navigate through them without feeling the need to grab a pint of Häagen-Dazs and eat straight out of the container.
The affects of the hundred crunches I did this morning tells me to refrain from it and I begin to pour through the responses.
Something clearly sticks out to me.
Ladies in their twenties find intimacy to be a scary thing.
They use words like “nervous” .. “scary” .. “frightening” .. “cautious”
In a world where sexuality is on full blast, intimacy is often pushed under the rug. How can we be so comfortable yet so uncomfortable?
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Observations on Intimacy:
(3o0 ppl. surveyed)
(1) Twenty-something men generally think of the act of physical sex as intimacy. Simple response. Black and white, really. Sex was the most common word that came up in their responses for their thoughts on “words that come to mind when you think ‘intimacy'”.
(2) Twenty-something women described their feelings when they thought of words describing intimacy. They shared their fears, doubts, reservations, and insecurities.
(3) Men describe intimacy in clear-cut lines, tangible black and white categories, while women are not able to disconnect tangible affection from the emotional. There is a lot of room for gray and color with them.
(4) Brokenness in intimacy among twenty-somethings is the common elephant-in-the-room.
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In many ways, the difference between men and women in terms of intimacy is vast and loud. I can’t help but wonder what are some of the experiences that women have felt or have seen that cause genuine fear. Where’s the disconnect? Relationships and marriages often involve intimacy, but for many, one or both individuals approach it as strangers.
Can you imagine.. intimate strangers?
Everything in me wants to close the gap.
I’m going to put this on pause for now.. giving us some time to chew on the above.. and I’ll share more of my thoughts on intimacy among twenty-somethings in a little bit.
Think & Chat: How do we bridge the gap between strangers? How can we perceive intimacy through a lens that is restored, healthy, and pure? What are some external factors that change the perception of intimacy today? What are some things that come to YOUR mind when you think about this idea of ‘intimate strangers’? Let’s begin to talk these things out..